No, things are not doing good. i don't know whats going on. It's 5:39 in the morning currently as i type. I don't really feel like a good person. She said the reasons where I dont have my GED. My sleeping habits suck. (cant sleep till three don't wake up till 1) And i dont have a job. (aunt and uncle hired me yesterday) I guess i just wasn't good enough for her. it just sucks. I love her. And I'm not good enough yet again. The only reason i don't have my GED is because what money i got i bought food or paid bills the only exception to that is some money i lent to people so they could pay bills and get groceries, i will admit i spent 12 dollars to go to a concert. and i was wrong for that. And I've bought A LOT of hot-wheels which hopefully will gain value and pay for my kids college someday. so yeah. I'm just not good enough.
Even my friends are not doing so good. a really close friends parents may be splitting up. and i feel for him ive watched my mom and dad divorce and my mom and step dad fight. its never easy. But, all i can do is be there for support. some other friends are going through relationship issues all there own. Ya know, the world just isn't doing that great. I'm sure if thats my sleep deprived opinion, or a logical view, or if thats just how i see it because of how hurt i am.
I guess i should go ahead and drop another general update. I'm back with my mom. I feel like hell I've been sick gone through so much in the last two weeks. and straight up feel alone. Don't get me wrong, My friends are there for me i know they always will be. And i am thankful for that. If any of you guys are reading this thank you. Very much you all know who you guys are.
I'm not sure what else to say right now. I know i need to sleep but every time i try i end up crying knowing i lost her. well i guess on a somewhat good note i did something new tonight. went to a hookah bar. didn't smoke anything still not my style but i did at least go. its actually pretty chill. But i wish it was under better condition then trying to hate my life less.
I need to try to sleep. Good night everyone.
-Taggart.
